Sunday, May 07, 2006


I'm so sorry, failedpessimist. Je suis desolee.
This is it, then. Ca y est.
phase two of my life

Goodbye. :)
I'm trying to be as unsentimental as possible, but I guess it's best not to fight it.
Onslaught of emotions, but ah, choices.
Smile and wave, boys, smile and wave.


By the way, please don't relink me. Merci beaucoup, chacun.
Classics are the books that everyone celebrates but nobody reads.

The quotes that (I think) reinforce my tentative theory of time:

Clocks slay time... time is dead as long as it is being clicked off by little wheels; only when the clock stops does time come to life.
William Faulkner

Time is life! I wonder if that's what he's trying to say.
Clocks slay time. Although clocks are pretty.

Sometimes I feel that life is passing me by, not slowly either, but with ropes of steam and spark-spattered wheels and a hoarse roar of power or terror. It's passing, yet I'm the one who's doing all the moving.
Martin Amis, Money

Men talk of killing time, while time quietly kills them.
Dion Boucicault

Time goes, you say? Ah no!
Alas, Time stays, we go.
Henry Austin Dobson

You must have been warned against letting the golden hours slip by; but some of them are golden only because we let them slip by.
James Matthew Barrie

If you are seeking creative ideas, go out walking. Angels whisper to a man when he goes for a walk.
Raymond Inmon

That's it, I'm going for a walk.

Burghley Tennis Center. :)
Where I'm currently having tennis lessons until the ACSI guys finish their exams.


It's kinda fun. I'm making a mental list of places I wanna go to during the hols. Badminton courts, tennis courts, gyms... maybe I'll even pick up squash. Just for fun.

ohoh before I replied to anonymous, he smsed me again.

Hmm..U sure r afraid 2 reply me isit?

Okay. So I decided to pull off the poshly-superior tone. :D

um, darling, has it ever crossed your mind that you're not really -worth- a reply? i don't honestly hold much with anonymous people, but i suppose i'll make an exception, since you're so persistent. no, i don't want 2 c u, since i'm not comfortable with secretive people in the first place, but i would consent to online chats. add me at anastazsia, hotmail - but only if you would care to, naturally. Up 2 u.. :)

He actually fell for it.
I think he's a coward.

Wad anastazsia? Is it

And I affirm that nonchalantly.

It's fun attempting to play cool. :D
With jerks, that is.
And yesssss, I do have an Just don't use it much.

haha, I realize I sound like I'm bragging. Okay, I admit, this anonymous has kinda piqued my curiosity, if only momentarily.

Sunday's gone already. Sort of. I can't wait till the holidays.

Tennis camp, second week of the June holidays, tentatively.

I can't wait till French class. Get my results back.
Though I betcha I'll get a B at best. :)


"I dropped my phone four times," says my sister.
ag. Primary three and she's got a camera phone!
Okay. I got my first phone when I was in primary five. I spent forty dollars playing Snake and my mum scolded me and I stopped playing Snake but occasionally I do go to Neopets and play meerca chase.

Having cup noodles now.

Since xanga's out of the way, maybe I'll consider a livejournal. I've already got one, but I'm not telling, because my posts there are incredibly stupid.

PAP won for Aljunied. :D

Imagine a fiery tempered, wilful bar hostess/bitchy goth falling for the charm of a blue eyed sunshine surfer dude and going all tame and 'awww' in his strong muscled arms.

That's exactly what makes fiction unrealistic.

Let her walk out on him. Scar his pretty arms. Cheat on him.

Now that's what she'd do. yaay

No wait, no scar. Apparently that only makes guys more attractive. well gah! The world is sexist.

I'm considering getting a tagboard.
And a new skin.
C'est ennuyeux.

"I hate green tea peppermint."
ohmygosh. My sister just said that! She just said that!

oh, and she asked me to leave messenger on when I leave for Chinese tuition, because she wants to talk to my friends. It's fun, according to her. She'd know. She's done it twice already, due to my extreme carelessness. So if "I" suddenly start talking to you in chatspeak, YOU KNOW IT'S HER.

okay. Cup noodles are not good.

Saturday, May 06, 2006

You know a few posts ago, I mentioned anonymous' latest message. I didn't reply to it, and now anonymous has sent another sms:

Y? Afraid 2 reply?

gah. That guy annoys the shit outta me.
He's rather unskilled in the ways of conversation, and I'm not talking about chatspeak here. If you, dear reader, are interested- I'll give you his handphone number and you can help me flame him.

quoting his previous previous sms:
since i noe u n if u 1 2 c me,we can meet up! Up 2 u..

No, I don't want to c him, but if he wants to c me, he can always say so. (because if I'm guessing correctly and he's Stanley, he's been pretty brazen before)

Alright, you know something bothers me when I mention it in more than one paragraph when blogging.

just... let me rant. Okay. Steeeeeeeeeam.

-breathe in-


although that's rather hypocritical of me to say so, because I admit, if I liked a guy and he desperately wanted to see me, it'd seem rather romantic. Though if that's repeated more than once, I'll be seeing him as needy and over-protective or maybe wimpy and clingy and I'd... dump him or something.

I got the May issue of LIME. Funny, it's all gossip and interviews and reviews and stuff. It's pretty pointless, three bucks for a ten minute read. And I like it.
Just like I adore (good) chick-lit.
Chick-lit is pretty stereotyped, though.
Trashy chick-lit is what most readers have in mind.
But chick-lit is often funny, or at least poignant and romantic.

ohh anyway. Maybe it's the exhilaration at finally catching up with friends, but anyhoo.
I went to Shell with Paula.
We went to Conway and talked a lot.
Then Saranya and Amanda came, coincidentally, though we weren't really surprised at their arrival. And we talked with them.
And then Shi Hao and Sutthersan came, and they kept away for a while, and then Sutthersan approached us, and then etc etc and finally all of us hung out at the red monkey bar place.

I sang a lot. Any song my memory could catch hold of.
The ZPS song.
SNGS school song (though I could only remember the first few lines, it's in chinese so I didn't really bother memorizing it much)
Majulah Singapura!
Yue4 liang4 dai4 biao3 wo3 de xin1
Yue4 lai2 xiang1 (I could only remember these three words)
top of the world!
some familiar but dodgy melody I was humming


do, a deer, a female deer
re, a drop of golden sun
mi, a name, I call myself
fa, a long long way to runnnnnn
soh, a needle pulling thread
la, a note that follows soh
ti, a drink with jam and bread
and it brings us back to

I love trying to reach high notes.

I admit, I miss having a social life in my neighbourhood.

Saranya's moving.
Nigel's moving.
Saranya?! Why oh why oh why!
Nigel? Okay, I can deal with that since I didn't know him well, but it'll be funny - driving past his house and knowing there's no Nigel inside.

Paula and I have made a pact-
we shall play badminton just about every day during the June hols, so she can become a kickass player, and after the holidays she can audition for badminton and get into the team.
she thinks ZSS sucks.
I think SNG sucks too.
ZPS and Kindergarten and Alliance Francaise are the best schools I've ever attended. :D
okay, kindergarten wasn't that good. I kept crying. I was spoilt. I was the only one in my level who hated vegetables. Sometimes as punishment they sent me to eat with the nursery section.
okay, kindergarten sucked. The guys bullied me and those younger than me shunned me.
I had this sort of reputation as the kindergarten crybaby.
hahah, Paula also had some sort of reputation. I'm not sure what exactly but during afternoon nap time, she always slept next to the wall, away from the rest of the k2s.

hm. okay. Gonna reply to anonymoussssssss
Just woke up. Past four hours or so have been spent locked up in my room, and me alternating between sleep and fuzzy moments of consciousness. Tiredtiredtired. Stupid powerpoint imma sending to Paula is taking ages to load. Switching to gmail now. HURRY UP HURRY UP.
Sorry I'm in a bad mood. Funny how things always choose to go wrong when you're in a bad mood. Stacy after she has just woken up is rarely in a good mood.

oh, now gmail isn't working.

Not Found
Error 404



I give up. I'll send the powerpoint later. Happy now, gmail?


off to Shell with Paula now.

Friday, May 05, 2006

Ceramic lessons are fun.
I like moulding stuff with my hands, though I'm not that good at moulding anyway.
I don't like coiling, though. On that spinning thing. I've got no control where endlessly spinning stuffs are concerned.

When I was in my cardboard phase, I had this thought of the soul being a frightened thing, two eyes peeking out of a cardboard box in lieu of our body.

mind soul body

oh gaah, I don't know. I feel like I'm two people. It's someone else who's the lit rep. It's someone else who gets praised and scolded. It's someone else who talks to all the people on msn while I sit pondering in a comfy black leather swivel chair.

Accompanied my mum to King's Medical just now. Walked around the empty clinic a bit while she was in the doctor's room thing. There were lots and lots of posters on birth control, erectile d-something, more so than other posters and brochures. Levitra thing. Apparently Viagra's not all that good anymore.

Anyway, they had this height measurement thing. Started from 60cm. I stood next to it and was all, oh gosh, I can't be shorter than 145cm! If I was 140cm or so, then... Okay, I tried to estimate Robyn's dad height (180) according to the way the measure was positioned, and... he'd be almost as tall as the ceiling.

Man, they placed the measure way too high up.

gavin degraw.
I want

to play tennis every single day.
to play badminton every single day.
to play hockey every single day.
to go jogging every single day.
to do the monkey bars every single day.
to read good chick-lit.
to have a beautiful long conversation with at least one person every day.
to tour Europe. (pretty much sums it up, but it loses the pizzazz. France! Paris! Italy! Venice!)
to sing!
to dance!
that enya cd.

Might as well set my goals.

English: High A1
Lit: High A1
Maths: Borderline A2
Chinese: Borderline B3
Biology: Borderline A1
Chem: Average A1
Physics: can't tell yet. Hopefully a borderline A2.
Geography: Borderline A1
History: High A2
Art: B3

If I hit my targets, perhaps I'll persuade my mum to sign me up for creative writing classes.

to perfect my tackle, dribble, hit, sweep, false passes. Especially tackle and false passes.

just... to be able to play a proper, fast-paced game. And be able to serf over the net.

60 situps.
30 pullups.
A C for sitandreach, whatever that may be.
An A for standing broad jump, whatever that may be.
An A for my shuttle run, whatever that may be.
At the most, 12 minutes for the 2.4km run.

Maybe I'll considering getting a new hockey stick if I achieve all the sports-related goals.


Going to the rgs choir concert next Thursday. Supporting Pei Ying, par normalement, haha.
Man, I miss primary school. I miss primary school. I miss it so bad.


Gone people... up awkward with their things... gone.
From Gone Going by Black Eyed Peas.

Is it me, or does that line definitely have some sexual implications?

And Tom Cruise said something about Katie Holmes now being Kate Holmes because that's a proper name for a child-bearing woman who's grown up and all.

That seems pretty chauvinistic, the asshole.
But if she's okay with it, then, well, okay. Her choice. :/

but jeez. Kate Holmes?

Drove past the stadium place where WP was rallying. My mum and I. Gosh, it was amazing. The place was effing jammed up and everywhere there were people people people!

We backed out though. Too many cars. Not enough space.

Apparently my granduncle on my dad's side was the founder of the Singapore Progressive Party, years and years ago. They lost to PAP though.
Wait, was he my granduncle?
He was my grandmother's sister's husband.
So yeah. We're not related by blood, but it's kind of interesting to have such a, err, political (?) relative. Maybe he's dead now.

Yeah, must be. Otherwise I would've met him before.

Then again, you never know. I've realized that I have no idea who half of the people from my dad's side are. All those distantly related people who know my name, or only recognize me when my grandmother points out that I'm 'ah boy's eldest daughter'.

My dad's known as 'ah boy' in the family, though he's like, forty plus.


I am... ah boy's eldest daughter. Cool.

beauty of the beast

ooh. Molten curry.
Something went wrong in the microwave.
Once I tried to turn playdough into ceramic by putting it into the microwave.
Came out burnt and stuff.

Needs to be like, one or two thousand degrees.

Clay and stuff is so fussy. Ceramic.
Just like I'm a really really fussy eater.
No vegetables. Absolutely no vegetables.
Nothing with onion in it.

And all the other pet peeves that will take too long to list.
They sell pig ears to dogs.

I went to Pet Station with Robyn and Paula today. We saw a St. Bernard. Golden retriever. Cavalier. Pomeranian. Beagle (uber cute, fyi, that one). Highland terrier, or smth like that. Husky. French bull dog. Dober... Dober what? There was a cage which was labelled 'Schnauzer' but there was no Schnauzer inside. Daaaaaaamn.

I remember Zong Han had a Schnauzer. He talked about it a lot. He said it was fat but ran fast. He said once his mum bought a live crab, put it in the plastic bag and put it on top of the microwave for the night. In the morning it was walking about in the plastic bag on the floor. He said he was forced to attend piano class because his sister did. He said his sister tattled on him a lot. He said... he said what? Oh. He said he hates being called Wilson, which is his christian name. He was liulaoshi's pet, albeit an unwilling one. He's a pretty funny guy who always passed my paper to the back, stole my hairband, played pranks on the girls.

Oh, wow. Lovely primary school memoriex. hahas.

Paula gave me a flower. Hibiscus.
We had a lovely garden, before our house got renovated. Carpet grass, a rosebush that didn't bloom much. My grandma always said that once a full rose bloomed, a tiny, pretty fairy baby would emerge from within the flower. Thus I watered them quite diligently.
We had hibuscuses too. They were really pretty. And we had the... allamanda? I'm not sure. It's the yellow flower with poisonous leaves.

Plants grow fruits to protect their seeds.

haha, I remember that! Mrs. Lee taught us that! In p5 or something. I found it immensely interesting and noted it down in my wooden notebook, which I still bring to school everyday but don't write in. It's the one in which I diligently copied all my p5 and 6 science notes, the one I memorized for PSLE, the one Robyn borrowed to copy in the car. :D

Warm air contains more moisture than cold air.

I thought otherwise, in primary school. It came as quite a surprising bit of trivia. Useful trivia which came in handy for section B of the PSLE Science paper of 04.


Stop whining. Stop stop! Stop!

Does anyone want a free younger sister?

okay, I take that back.
But that doesn't mean she doesn't annoy me.
I'm just sure that deep down, deep deep down in my little stubborn heart, I love my sister. Deep down inside.

Remember how we always used to tease each other.
oooooh Robyn loves mushroom!
Saranya loves Shi Hao!
Amanda loves Shi Hao!
Paula loves Shi Hui!
kekes lolx.

Fun while they lasted. ;)

Though the embarrassment part, not quite.
I still can't forget that time we were at the playground, and Kenneth and blueshirtguy came cycling past, Amanda shouted out, "Stacy loves Kenneth!"
C'mon, we didn't even know each other. We only cycled past each other once or twice, occasionally, etc.
F'shit. He's been avoiding me ever since.
I was so angry that day, I started flinging sand at Amanda and Saranya.
eheh, sorry.
Royal humiliation, that.

I haven't had my revenge yet.

But that was two years ago.

hm. oh well.
Imma using Robyn's computer now. Paula's reading Newpaper. Robyn's watching some fashion show thingy. We're supposed to meet Saranya and the rest at Conway... soon.

The first inkling of my social life (consisting of more than two people or so) finally emerges after months and months.

Robyn, your backspace key is so hard to presss. Tinyyyy.

Paula's behind my back now. Reading what I'm typing.
We're supposed to be studying, but my study materials are on the table behind me, abandoned and pitiful.

Oh, Saranya and Amanda just came.


Hi Amanda.

I like Robyn's computer.

Hi Saranya.

Mad aren't you, Amanda's saying to me.

Hello. I'm not the one wearing a sweater in such hot weather.

Since 3.30pm I'vebeen here.

today in class, Calista said, "Let's go to the toilet."
And Pei Hwa said, "Okay, I also wanna go."
And I said, excitedly, "Let's go let's go to the toilet wheee"

And later in class, again Calista said, "Let's go to the toilet."
I heard her say "Let's go to China."

We had a mini squabble, involving a pair of red scissors, and somehow I ended up threatening to kill myself with it.

Mary-anne was absent today. During common test period, the teacher asked, "Is that girl absent?" while pointing to Mary-anne's empty seat. She was attending her relative's funeral or smth.
And one of our classmates said, "Funeral."

And we all burst out into giggles.

Hello i am robyn and i am interrupting her blog entry. its been ages.

you know you miss me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111

Okay. Continuing.

Mr. Foo thinks my slipper was cute.

I mean, we made tiny ceramic slippers, for art class.

Mr Foo said, "Haiyah, polling day tomorrow. Who d'you think I should vote for? PAP, WP, SDP?"

He revealed that he refuses to, at home, use the internet. He doesn't use modern stuff like iPods etc., he doesn't have a television, and I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't have a handphone. He says these will interrupt his work. He's an artist and art researcher. Eccentric guy who once snapped at our vice-principal. oh and that time, our class pissed him off. He shouted at us to "Get out", and after that he wrote on the whiteboard in the art room, "Irritated by 2Faith today".

but he's a nice guy. Open-minded and appreciative.

Now that's the kinda teacher I like. :D

oh, and someone scrawled on the teacher's table a love declaration to Mr. J. Cher.
Gotta love that hairy chest.
I heard Natalie scream that. :/
excusez moi s'il vous plait.

Robyn's gonna show me who Samsee is.

And she's sec4 so she's retired.

It hurts to laugh, oh my stomachhhhhh.

My mum might take me to a rally later. To 'see what it's like'.

I'd like that. :)